Guest post by Anchor & Key staff member, Nichole Q Perreault
How are you feeling about the upcoming holiday? Are you excited? Overwhelmed? Apathetic? A little bit of all of the above? Holidays can be tricky; like everything else, they are both beautiful and broken. They promise so much joy, and yet often they bring heartache.
This year, even if you are looking forward to Thanksgiving, you still might have some reservations, concerns, or even anxiety, about being with family and friends, especially after....dare I say it...the election. I mean, the holidays can be challenging enough, but add election drama and woooo-boy!
Maybe you’ve considered staying home. Or maybe you’ve been tempted to uninvite some people. Or maybe you’re heading into Thanksgiving with your boxing gloves on, ready to battle it out over turkey and stuffing. Or maybe the election isn’t a problem at all, but you’re still anxious about the holiday.
Of course, the “holiday” isn’t the issue, is it? The people are. Holidays are beautiful and broken because people are beautiful and broken. And we are the people. We are the beautiful and broken. We are the joy. And we are the heartache.
In the book The Other Half of Church by Michel Hendricks and Jim Wilder, joy is described as (paraphrasing) the feeling you get when you see the look on the face of someone who is happy to see you. Isn’t that a great description?!
Joy is relational. It is a face-to-face emotion. It exists only in relationships where there is genuine love, where our faces shine on one another. Does that sound familiar?
Joy is...the feeling you get when you see the look on the face of someone who is happy to see you.
I did a quick digital search and found 100 Bible verses related to the Lord’s face shining on His people! The most famous of all in Numbers 6:24-26:
The Lord bless you and keep you;
the Lord make his face shine on you
and be gracious to you;
the Lord turn his face toward you
and give you peace.
No wonder the holidays promise so much joy! We see loved ones face-to-face. We watch their faces light up when they see us. We feel their happiness shining on us. That is joy. And it strengthens us.
A couple of the crazy holidays with our families. Look at the joy!
But what about those times when someone greets us with apprehension? With a smirk? Or an eye roll? Or what if they don’t look at us at all? No joy!
We long to be seen. To be welcomed. To be loved. When we aren’t, that is heartache. We pull back. We darken our faces. We turn away. And many times, we turn toward someone else and, even if it wasn’t meant for them, they see our darkened face. And they, in turn, feel unseen, unwelcome, unaccepted, unloved. They are robbed of joy. And the cycle continues.
We can bring joy, which strengthens. And we can bring heartache, which weakens.
So what does that mean for the holidays? Especially after a contentious election?
One of my favorite book series is The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins (note I said books not movies). In Collins’ dystopian world, corrupt rulers divide the nation of Panem into Districts based primarily on socio-economic status. It’s an oppressive system designed to exploit the underclasses for the benefit of an elite, untouchable, ruling class known as The Capitol.
Every year, The Capitol chooses two teenagers from each district, 24 in all, to fight one another to the death, in a sort of futuristic gladiator battle known as “The Hunger Games.” The purpose of The Games is to keep the Districts in perpetual war against one another, thus preventing the underclass from realizing their own collective power and rising up against The Capitol.
And it worked. Until Katniss Everdeen came on the scene. Katniss, in a series of events sparked by the courageous decision to take her younger sister’s place in The Games, becomes the reluctant leader of an uprising against The Capitol.
But while Katniss is the central character, it’s clear that she never could have toppled the oppressors on her own. In fact, it’s her mentor, Haymitch, who tells Katniss exactly what she needs to hear.
He says, “Katniss, when you are in the arena, remember who the real enemy is.”
Remember who the real enemy is.
Haymitch wanted her to remember that even though they were trying to kill her, the other players were pawns, just like her. He wanted her to look past their vicious sneers and their fear-filled eyes. (No joy!) He wanted her to look at them differently. He wanted her to really see them. He wanted her to remember that they had a common enemy: The Capitol.
And he wanted her to change the game. Which she does. But not on her own.
What changed The Games - and changed the game - wasn't Katniss alone, but Katniss who is loved and loves others. Love changed the game.
The reason I love this series so much is that it's a powerful metaphor for life:
We’re all living our own sort of Hunger Games. We are the players and this fallen world is the arena. And while sometimes it may look and feel like the person across the table, or across the aisle, is the enemy, they’re not. Rather, we all have a common enemy: satan, the enemy of God, the enemy of good, and the enemy of our souls.
This enemy whispers in our ears, screams from the television, or flashes on our phones: those people are your enemies!!!! And all too often, we believe him. And turn away from God.
We enter the day’s arena looking for a fight. Instead of joy, we cast suspicion. Instead of love, we offer fear. And this division is the first step toward our mutual destruction.
As long as we believe other people are our enemies, we are sapped of love, sapped of joy, sapped of strength, and more vulnerable than ever to our real enemy.
Jesus understood this and I think it’s one of the many reasons He commands us to love our enemies, or as I’ve begun to call them: my perceived enemies. Because even if the guest who brought the mashed potatoes voted for a candidate I didn't, that guest is not my enemy. That guest is just another player caught in the arena of this fallen world.
And Jesus is asking us to change the game. And we can. Because He already has.
Love changed the game.
So as this holiday approaches, spend some time with the Lord.* Let His face shine on you in love and strengthen you with joy.
When you step into the arena of Thanksgiving dinner, I want you to remember who the real enemy is. And I want you so full of the Lord’s love that you cast the light of joy on everyone who sees your face.
I want you to look beyond sides and factions. I want you to see, really see, your family and friends. I want you to let the Kingdom of God course through your veins, spill all over the living room floor and invade the arena with love. I want you to be the first among all the players transformed by joy.
I want you to change the game. And you can. Because He already has.
~ Nichole Q Perreault
*As you consider how you will approach your “perceived enemies” you may want to read Renee’s post from last year which addresses the topic of pre-forgiveness which can help you enter into a situation with your heart already in the posture of Christ. You will be amazed at what God can do when we choose to live with attitude of forgiveness!
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